Inanity · Writing

Can anyone get me a universal remote please?

I think this is the longest I’ve gone without posting. This was an extremely frustrating week, I barely had time to do anything except work because I was on incredibly short deadlines and had to work overtime to get everything done. It didn’t improve much today, and I’m already looking forward to the weekend. I wish I could just skip ahead like Adam Sandler did in his movie, Click.

In Click, Sandler’s character gets a remote control that controls aspects of his life and enables him to relive parts of his life, go on auto-pilot, skip unpleasant things…

The best remote control EVER.

However, Sandler misused the remote, and that really messed up his life. Now I admit I might’ve made some of the mistakes he did, but for the most part having that remote would’ve really helped me out. I have a list too!

I would do anything to skip those five stages in between.
  • Work – I don’t really like my job. I work as a translator, and while I would’ve preferred to translate novels and the like, that option wasn’t available to me. So mostly at my job we translate legal and financial stuff, and it can really get boring and tedious after a while. If you’ve read any legal jargon, you’ll understand what I mean. What I would like to do is just go on auto-pilot during my working hours. Sandler appeared to function efficiently while on auto-pilot, and he even got a promotion!
  • Weekends – Oh these will be put on a loop. Just imagine how good it would feel to come to Sunday, expecting to face a Monday the next morning, only to realise that it’s Saturday again! … though I guess that would negate the need for going through work on auto-pilot. Hmm. I will have to think this through.

  • Writing – I haven’t been writing lately because I just haven’t been finding time for that. But this remote would give me all the time I need. I would pause everything around me (including time) and write to my heart’s content without any distractions or feeling that I’m too short on time. I would also include an option that would enable me to turn on creativity like a faucet. It can be done, Calvin!
  • Memories – Now, I know Sandler’s remote didn’t have an option for this, but I would include a button that could erase unwanted memories. I’m sure everyone has something they’d like to forget (an embarrassing moment, a fight, etc), and an “Erase Memory” button would definitely come in handy here.
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  • Background Music – Have you ever been in a situation where you thought, “Some background music would be awesome right about now”? By background music I mean the kind of music that plays in movie scenes and whatnot. I just think it would be awesome if I could have the option to play my favourite tracks during some situations in my life.

What would you use the remote for? Any feature you might include? How did you like the movie? The ending drives me to tears every. Single. Time. If you haven’t watched it, I do recommend you do; it’s pretty awesome. =]

12 thoughts on “Can anyone get me a universal remote please?

    1. Aw, thanks, Karen! I translate from English to Arabic and vice versa. It actually a nice career on its own, but when you’re overwhelmed and on a tight schedule all the time, it can get really frustrating. =[

  1. I never saw that film, but I always go back to a kids’ program called Bernard’s Watch. Bernard had a watch that could freeze time, so that he could continue with stuff while everything around him was paused. Now that would come in handy! Say – an extra hour’s sleep, or an extra hour to fit in things like regular writing or exercise?

    1. I don’t think I’ve heard of that program, but that watch would indeed come in handy! I would do anything for an extra hour of sleep during those mornings when getting out of bed is a struggle.

      … actually that’s pretty much every morning, haha.

  2. Hello,
    I would definitely go for a remote like this. I agree with you about the elevator music one. That is hilarious, but so true. Sometimes music would just make certain spots in your life a whole lot more interesting. 🙂 I think I would also have a pause button. So I could press it early in the morning when I get up to write. So that the days sounds and annoying birds outside would be quiet while I write! 🙂 hehe. Neat Post! Keep Writing!

    1. Yes, exactly! Soundtracks would just make everything a lot more interesting that it really is, haha. And the pause button would definitely help in writing – no more people to distract you or sounds to annoy the heck out of you. Can you imagine how productive we’d be?
      Thank you for your comment! =D

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